“In Great Successes, Fear Breeds Accomplishment”

Earlier this year, my boyfriend had exposed me to “Million Dollar Listing New York”, and I had watched a different verson of MDL in the past. As we began to watch it, I immediately was off-put by the seemingly over-the-top persona of one of the show’s stars, Fredrik Eklund. He very quickly grew to be our most favourite on the show and we always looked forward to when Fred would burst into some sort of fabulously expressive moment that would somehow increase his undeniable cuteness.

Anyhow, I found out that he wrote a book called The Sell: The Secrets of Selling Anything to Anyone. I subscribe to Audible and every month, subscribers get a credit for a free book. I try to resist buying audio books impulsively since you pay for the app, but I simply couldn’t with his. It is amazing, and I have actually listened to parts of it over ten times.

The foreword, written by Barbara Corcoran, is also amazing. Something interesting happened a few weeks ago though. In listening to the book this last time, her quote ‘in great successes, fear breeds accomplishment’ shifted something for me.

The concept of balancing what I am terrified of continuing to experience mixed with what I desperately long to experience has empowered me to majorly scale back on spending, overeating and doing any of the little things I regularly do to give my power away.

I no longer feel the external threat of something happening because that was only symbolic of my own disconnect and hangups about myself and my life.

This is so brand new and I have moments where I give in to the old psychology but it’s like I am demolishing the house that I currently live in because it was poorly constructed, and I am now able to built a more solid house. One where I am aware of the dangers within my control and where I won’t create something bad by way of ignorance and neglect.

This is the beginning of the real work, but it’s like I’ve learned how much faster getting up the stairs can be now that I can skip two at a time.

❤ LA 🙂

That Triumphant Return, Tho.

It would definitely seem that I had all but abandoned this beautiful little blog. Anyone who read my last post would probably be happy to know that the best friend I was referring to actually became my boyfriend, and he is even better at that.

So much has changed, I am not sure of where to begin. I broke up with the guy I had been dating in March 2014, and subsequently went through the beginnings of a grand opening-into-myself that allowed me the ability to really relax (at least as much as I could) and begin to trust in the unfolding of things. I suppose that is the reason for my comeback.

I remember starting this blog because I wanted to connect. I remember loving the responses I received and how uplifting it felt to be recognized by Trevor Kucheran after reading his memoirs. I also remember partially abandoning the site because my best friend thought that the name Immersed in Possible was lame. After discussing it with my boyfriend though, I think it’s a great name.

I remember my inspiration for it, which still inspires me today was because saying “be positive” felt so cliche and empty. It didn’t resonate with me. Immersing myself in what it possible? Heck yeah that inspires me.

So, in short… I love it. This is an exciting time. I want to connect, to inspire and to enliven those parts of myself and others that get bogged down by daily stresses. I am thinking of posting every 1-3 days, but at least weekly. I am committing to that. Of course, I’d love it if it was daily, but after two years of silence, let’s not get ahead of ourselves 😉

 

LA ❤ 🙂

Re-Energized Weight Shed

Weight is a funny thing. For most people, it’s so gradual that you gain 5, 10, 15, even 30 lbs. Most don’t even see it happening, myself included. I mean, you know. You have to know, but when you look in the mirror, it’s tough to see something so gradual influence the way you see what you see. In my case, I’m fortunate in the sense that I proportion weight quite well. I am actually significantly heavier than I look, so when I gain 5 or 10 lbs, it’s easy not to notice. In August, I’d shed 20 lbs in 21 days. Or 21 lbs in 20 days, I can’t quite remember. What motivated that was some implied judgment from a doctor (to clarify, he said I was healthy, but he merely was excited to hear me say I intended to shed the excess weight). This clued me in to what motivates me.
 
This time however, the motivation came last night. I was talking to a friend about this shirt I made, and he asked to see it on me. I positioned my camera to take a picture and I saw my figure. While still sort of a figure, it was certainly not as slim as it was the last time I took a picture of this caliber. I looked fat. Hella fat in my eyes. Whether I am fat to anyone I know or value the opinion of, doesn’t matter. For me, I take full responsibility for things that happen in my life. Whether that’s my health, my financial situation or my relationships. I also know that I should hover around a specific range for my optimal weight, all things factored in.
 
November 26, 2013 is Day 1 of my rehabilitation. I hope to take it reasonably slow and steady, and to stay conscious about the objective at hand. At the end of the day, weight (as with health, finances, relationships and professional success) is a result of everything that contributed to its creation. The same way that I created this situation, I can reverse it and make the minor adjustments in my mindset toward maintaining consciousness about the whole thing. I know what I need to do to shed the weight itself, but I’m serious about wanting better for myself. More serious than I have been in the past.
 
I believe people are continually improving, and that ultimately the key thing is to feel like you are making progress. In reality, I don’t think most people expect to be supermodels or millionaires. I think they just want to be better off than they feel they are currently. There are always exceptions, but the vast majority is pretty much the same from my experience.
 
Excitement is the theme for this new year. As 2013 is winding down, I am starting to consider the sort of woman I want to be in 2014. I turn 23 in August, and I am feeling so emotional about the whole thing. Positive emotions of course, but emotional nonetheless. I’m turning over a new leaf in my life. There’s the new position I started on November 19, the vastly improved dating life, and improved platonic relationships. This change should fit in perfectly. 

Is it Really That Hard?

I’m feeling re-inspired. Something I’ve really been considering lately is our perception of how difficult a given task can be, as opposed to the reality. What skills would one need to have to be considered valuable in that role, or offering that service?
 
Recently I spoke with someone in a leadership role whom I really admire about breaking social barriers. There is a window of time between becoming aware of someone and actually getting to know someone. If it exceeds that short time, it’s harder to establish rapport. I’m trying to limit just how many of those interactions I have. My friend discussed how she simply threw herself into it. Whenever she saw an opportunity, she found some way to be genuinely interested in the other person. If you’re sincere, it doesn’t seem contrived. She explained that she realized soon after becoming part of the group, that people were giving very clear signals as to how they saw things. If they were isolated, she knew she had to approach them differently than if they were laughing loudly with coworkers.
 
I found her advice about throwing myself into it really inspiring. It had me asking “is it really that hard to establish something special, superficial or otherwise with an aquaintance?”. The answer I came to was that it wasn’t too hard, as long as I maintained my willingness to adapt. Is it challenging? Yes, but it’s absolutely worth it. 
 
Interestingly enough, I received two invites that would put me in very social situations. Guess what? I’m going to try to attend both (incidentally they’re both in the same day, so I’ll see!). 

Little Steps, Baby Steps

I have had this blog for an entire year at this point. When I first began it, I was so thrilled. I still am thrilled at the growing potential of this as a forum to freely share thoughts that weigh heavily on my mind. Something that occurred to me recently makes me chuckle. Momentary excitement is exactly that, momentary. People will always return to what they know and are most familiar with, even if it’s not in their best interest. I have accepted that taking little steps, baby steps is the only way to progress in a comfortable, easy fashion that ultimately leads to success.

This has always been in the back of my mind, though I live for the moments when things just click. The moments when ideas that didn’t resonate are softened just perfectly.

My life is becoming better than it ever has been. I’m surrounded by beautiful people, part of amazing opportunities, and I have my health. I couldn’t ask for more except for the space of time to be minimized between myself and my ultimate success. I know there’s a reason for that though, and I love that too.

Most of it is letting go to take those little steps, you know, those baby steps. Being patient, comforting yourself along the way.

Soaking it In

During certain moments, I’ve cycled in various stages of helplessness. I’ve blamed others, even myself for things that weren’t truly problems. From a scarce mindset however, I couldn’t see reality. I was tainted in my perception of how my life actually was. I built walls around myself, a self-imposed limitation that I was constantly pretending I couldn’t escape. I’d do my best to distract myself to affirm this limitation, but I laugh now. I laugh because I just let go of the last two years by taking a little step. Or, was it really so little?

I recently began really soaking in my current situational advantages. My workplace was always something I pretended was such a prison, such a tragic place to spend my time. This thinking was incredibly exhausting, and I was often reduced to such childish frustration. It was a fascinating contrast to where I am now. For the first time in my life, I’m about to transition into a new role in a professional context. The manifestation of work progress has more to do with letting things happen than making them happen. 

My Team Lead was amazing. He took over another team, which I knew signaled an end to the role I was currently in. Something about his progress inspired my own. I know that he respects me, and I find that more valuable than words can express. Nothing could establish that except the quality of my work and who I am. I earned his respect and support. Realizing that six months ago would have made me uncomfortable, but it doesn’t now. Perhaps it’s maturity, or perhaps it’s just having a keen awareness of a more effective reality. He was integral in pushing me to progress as well. I finally see what good leadership will do for the people ready, willing and able to trust in the unfolding.

The unfolding, that sounds like some pretty high level sh*t. It is, and I love it. I like having the awareness to see, accept and love that life is a mirror. Soak it all in, especially the tough parts. You’re supposed to.

Laryngitis & the Value of the Voice

I think that most people have at last some sort of idea that many things in Western society are taken advantage of. I live in an area where it gets very cold in the winter. If it weren’t for electricity and natural gas heating, thousands would die and life here would be unbearable. After everything that could be burned was burned, people would naturally gravitate as closely to warmer climate as they could.

Twice this year I have developed laryngitis. The first time was near the end of August, and I am in the throes of another spell of it that has been angry since yesterday morning. I sound like what Barry White would have sounded like had he smoked tinfoil for 186 years. It’s embarrassing and it means that today I called in sick to work. My work depends on my speaking ability. If I can’t speak, I cannot work.

This got me really thinking about my life. Specifically, how much I take advantage of my ability to see, speak, to breathe through my nose. To have a functioning, healthy body. What a magnificent thing that most people only begin to truly appreciate once they lose something integral to their existences.

From this point forward, I really want to take some time to really begin taking care of myself. Refining my diet, my thinking, the experiences I invite into my life. What’s the point of travelling if you can’t walk properly to really appreciate some of life’s greatest?