On July 26, I had an appointment with my new doctor. My first doctor’s appointment in far too long. My entire adult life I have always had optimal blood pressure, at least according to those in-store heartbeat checker things. I don’t know what they’re called, though I would always chuckle when I’d think of someone’s super fat arm being squeezed hard enough to hit the ‘release’ button. Anyhow, at this particular doctor’s appointment, while I don’t recall the specific numbers, they told me my blood pressure was higher. Understandably and somewhat expectedly as I’d recently gained 23 lbs.
My doctor walked in the room and we talked about the bidness. When I revealed my intentions to lose the weight I’ve gained, he perked up like a dog that just woke himself up with one of his own bodily functions. I realized that this made me accountable. I’d obviously never cared about my health all that much, I’d been nearly 80 lbs. heavier prior and ate all kinds of processed foods. But this was different for me, it was time.
I let go. I let go of my attachment to food, the comfort, familiarity and safety it once offered faded in an instant. Around this time I also began considering a different way of living, a more sustainable way of living. A way where I could actually reach for my dreams. I’m sitting here, not knowing where to start, but that was a moment that changed my life.
I can only explain in clarity where I am right now. I am working at a job I spent three years wanting before I got it, and I’m in the perfect place in many ways. I committed to being a loving, giving person, asking myself “what can I give?” when interacting with every person. It’s not perfect yet, but it’s made me feel so much better about my life. It’s truly rewarding and absolutely sustainable. I wouldn’t change a moment of it because something special, many special things are coming my way.
I’m finally ready.